Sorry in Korean: How to Apologize the Right Way

The three main ways to say sorry in Korean

When people search for how to say sorry in Korean, they usually want one word, but Korean gives you three, and the choice between them matters. The three you need are 미안해 (mianhae), 미안해요 (mianhaeyo), and 죄송합니다 (joesonghamnida). They all translate to "sorry" in English, but they are not interchangeable. Using the wrong one is not a grammar error so much as a social one, like wearing gym clothes to a wedding. The words are technically fine, but they land wrong.

The difference between them is formality, which is the single most important idea in the Korean language. Every sentence you speak is tuned to your relationship with the listener: how close you are, who is older, who holds more status. An apology is one of the most sensitive moments for getting that tuning right, because you are already admitting fault, and doing it in the wrong register makes you sound careless about the person's feelings. So before the words, hold on to the shape of the system: casual for close equals and juniors, polite for most people, formal for elders and serious moments.

Here is the quick map. 미안해 (mianhae) is casual, for close friends and people younger than you. 미안해요 (mianhaeyo) adds the polite ending 요 (yo) and works for acquaintances, coworkers you are friendly with, and strangers in light situations. 죄송합니다 (joesonghamnida) is the formal, humble apology for strangers, elders, bosses, customers, and any mistake that actually matters. Get comfortable with these three and you can handle almost every apology Korean will ask of you.

Mianhae and mianhaeyo, the everyday apology

The word 미안해 (mianhae) comes from a root that means something close to "I feel bad toward you" or "I am uncomfortable facing you." That is a lovely way to think about it, because it frames an apology as being about the discomfort you feel for having wronged someone, not just a formula you recite. The base form you will see in a dictionary is 미안하다 (mianhada), but nobody says the dictionary form out loud. In real speech it becomes mianhae or mianhaeyo depending on how polite you need to be.

미안해 (mianhae) is the casual form, what Koreans call banmal. You use it with close friends, a sibling, a partner, or someone clearly younger than you who you have a relaxed relationship with. If you bump your best friend's arm and spill their coffee, mianhae is exactly right. Say it to a stranger on the subway, though, and it sounds oddly familiar, almost like you are talking down to them. The casualness that feels warm with a friend feels presumptuous with someone you do not know.

미안해요 (mianhaeyo) is the same word with the polite particle 요 (yo) attached. That little syllable does an enormous amount of work in Korean. It lifts the whole sentence into polite speech, jondaemal, which is your safe default with anyone you are not close to. Mianhaeyo suits a coworker, a neighbor, a classmate you are not tight with, or a stranger in a low-stakes moment. It is polite without being stiff, warm without being overly familiar. For a huge share of daily apologies, mianhaeyo is the word you actually want.

You will also hear the shorter noun 미안 (mian) tossed around between very close friends, almost like saying "my bad" in English. It is extremely casual and a little cutesy, so keep it for people you would happily text at 2 a.m. There is also 미안하지만 (mianhajiman), meaning "sorry, but," which softens a request or a piece of bad news, as in "sorry, but could you move your bag?" It is a politeness cushion more than a true apology.

Joesonghamnida, the formal apology

When an apology needs weight, you reach for 죄송합니다 (joesonghamnida). This is the formal, humble apology, and it carries a stronger sense of "I have done wrong and I am sorry" than mianhae ever does. The root 죄송하다 (joesonghada) literally leans toward a meaning like "I am at fault, I am guilty," so it feels more like a genuine acknowledgment of wrongdoing. The ending 합니다 (hamnida) is the most formal polite ending in Korean, the one you hear in announcements, business, and any respectful public speech.

You use joesonghamnida with strangers, elders, teachers, bosses, police, customers, and anyone whose status or age asks for real respect. It is also the right choice when the mistake itself is serious, even with someone you know, because scaling up the formality signals that you understand the weight of what happened. If you are late to a meeting with your manager, step on a stranger's foot on a packed train, or need to apologize to your partner's parents, joesonghamnida is the word.

There is a slightly softer polite version, 죄송해요 (joesonghaeyo), which uses the same respectful root but the gentler 요 (yo) ending instead of the stiff hamnida. Joesonghaeyo sits between mianhaeyo and joesonghamnida: more respectful and apologetic than mianhaeyo, but a shade warmer and less rigid than the full formal joesonghamnida. In a shop, a cafe, or a friendly-but-respectful exchange with someone older, joesonghaeyo often hits the sweet spot.

And just as mianhae had its "sorry, but" cousin, joesong has 죄송하지만 (joesonghajiman), meaning "I am sorry, but." You will hear this constantly in polite service situations and formal requests, as in "I am sorry, but the store is closing now" or "excuse me, but may I ask you something?" It is a formal softener that opens a sentence gently rather than a full standalone apology.

Banmal vs jondaemal, why formality decides everything

You cannot really understand Korean apologies without understanding the split between 반말 (banmal) and 존댓말 (jondaemal). These two words name the two great modes of Korean speech, and every apology lives inside one of them. Banmal is casual or "half" speech, stripped of the polite endings, used downward and sideways among intimates. Jondaemal is respectful speech, dressed in polite endings like 요 (yo) and 합니다 (hamnida), used upward and outward toward everyone else.

The dividing line is drawn by relationship, and it rests mostly on two things: closeness and relative age or status. You speak banmal with childhood friends, siblings, a partner, and people clearly younger who have given you the nod to relax. You speak jondaemal with strangers, elders, teachers, bosses, and, crucially, at the start of almost every new relationship until both sides agree to drop into banmal. Getting this wrong is one of the fastest ways a foreigner accidentally sounds rude, because using banmal too early feels like an unearned claim of intimacy.

Here is how it plays out for apologies specifically. If you are close and equal or older, 미안해 (mianhae) in banmal is warm and right. If there is any distance or the other person outranks you in age or status, you climb into jondaemal with 미안해요 (mianhaeyo) or 죄송합니다 (joesonghamnida). The same feeling of "I'm sorry" gets dressed differently depending on who is standing in front of you, and choosing the outfit correctly is half of what makes the apology land.

A practical rule for learners: default to jondaemal until you have a clear reason not to. Koreans almost never bristle at an apology that is a little too polite, but they can absolutely bristle at one that is too casual. If someone is older, senior, or a stranger, the polite and formal forms protect you. You can always relax into banmal later, once the relationship is close enough that casual speech feels earned rather than assumed. If you want the fuller picture of how this politeness system shapes the whole language, our guide on how to learn Korean puts it in context.

When to use each apology

Knowing the words is easy; knowing which to pick in the moment is the real skill. The decision comes down to a few quick questions you can run through in your head: How close are we? Are they older or higher status? How serious was the mistake? Am I in a formal setting like work or a shop? Let's walk through the common cases so the choice becomes automatic.

With close friends and people younger than you. Reach for 미안해 (mianhae), or the very casual 미안 (mian) for a tiny slip. You knocked over a friend's drink, you are ten minutes late to meet a buddy, you forgot to text back. Banmal is warm here, and switching to formal speech with a close friend would actually feel strange and cold, as if you were putting up a wall between you.

With acquaintances, coworkers, and strangers in light situations. Use 미안해요 (mianhaeyo). You brushed past someone, you need to correct a small mix-up with a classmate, you interrupted a coworker. Polite speech keeps things respectful without treating a minor moment like a crisis. This is the everyday middle gear, and you will use it constantly.

With elders, bosses, customers, and in serious moments. Use 죄송합니다 (joesonghamnida), or the slightly warmer 죄송해요 (joesonghaeyo) in gentler service settings. You were late to a meeting with your manager, you stepped on a stranger's foot, you made a mistake that inconvenienced a customer. Formal speech signals that you take both the person and the error seriously, which is exactly the message a real apology needs to send.

One more axis worth naming: the seriousness of the mistake can override closeness. If you seriously let down a close friend, bumping up from mianhae to a more heartfelt, fuller apology shows you grasp the weight of it. Formality in Korean is not only about who the person is; it is also a dial you turn up to match how much the moment matters. A grave apology to someone you love may borrow the gravity of formal speech even though you would normally use banmal.

How to say excuse me in Korean

English uses "excuse me" for a pile of different situations, and Korean splits them into separate phrases. Mixing these up with an apology is a classic beginner slip, so it is worth learning them as their own small set. None of these is really saying "sorry" for a wrong; they are ways to get attention, pass by, or interrupt politely.

To get someone's attention, especially to call a server in a restaurant or cafe, you say 저기요 (jeogiyo). It literally means something like "over there" or "excuse me, here," and it is the standard, perfectly polite way to flag down staff. Raise a hand and say jeogiyo and a server will come. Do not apologize with mianhaeyo to call a waiter; it would sound like you had done something wrong just by wanting to order.

To ask someone to let you pass, such as squeezing through a crowded train or past someone in a narrow aisle, you say 잠깐만요 (jamkkanmanyo), meaning "just a moment" or "one second, please." It is the gentle nudge that asks for a little space. Some people also use jeogiyo here, but jamkkanmanyo is the cleaner fit for "let me through."

For a more formal excuse me before interrupting or asking a question, you say 실례합니다 (sillyehamnida). This one is elegant: it literally means something like "I am committing a rudeness" or "pardon my impoliteness." You use it before interrupting someone, before asking a stranger for directions, before stepping in front of someone, or when entering and leaving certain formal spaces. There is also 실례지만 (sillyejiman), "excuse me, but," to open a polite question, as in "excuse me, but is this seat taken?" Sillyehamnida is respectful and safe with anyone.

Stronger and more sincere apologies

Sometimes a single word is not enough. When you have genuinely hurt someone or made a real mistake, Korean gives you ways to deepen the apology and make it clearly heartfelt. These build on the core three, and you layer them with tone and body language, which we will get to next.

A simple intensifier is 정말 (jeongmal), meaning "really" or "truly." Put it in front and you get 정말 미안해 (jeongmal mianhae), "I'm really sorry," or in polite and formal versions 정말 미안해요 (jeongmal mianhaeyo) and 정말 죄송합니다 (jeongmal joesonghamnida). Another common intensifier is 정말로 (jeongmallo), "truly," used the same way. These small additions turn a routine sorry into an emphatic one.

To take responsibility explicitly, you can say 내 잘못이야 (nae jalmosiya) in casual speech, meaning "it's my fault," or the polite 제 잘못이에요 (je jalmosieyo). Naming the fault as yours makes the apology feel accountable rather than vague. And to actually ask for forgiveness, there is 용서해 주세요 (yongseohae juseyo), "please forgive me," which is a strong, sincere phrase you would save for genuine wrongdoing, not a spilled drink.

You may also meet the noun 사과 (sagwa), meaning "an apology," which is the same sound as the word for "apple," a fact that Korean learners enjoy. You will see it in phrases like "to make an apology," and in news and formal contexts about public apologies. For everyday speaking you mostly need the verbs above, but recognizing sagwa helps you follow more formal talk about apologizing. If you want to expand the vocabulary around feelings and daily life that these phrases live in, our list of common Korean words is a good next stop.

How to reply and forgive

Apologies are a two-way street, so you also need to know what to say when someone apologizes to you. The good news is that the replies are few and easy, and once again they follow the same politeness logic as everything else.

The workhorse reply is 괜찮아요 (gwaenchanayo), meaning "it's okay" or "it's fine." With a close friend you drop the 요 and say 괜찮아 (gwaenchana). This same word doubles as "are you okay?" when said as a question, so it is one of the most useful phrases in the whole language. Someone bumps you, says mianhaeyo, and you smile and say gwaenchanayo. Done.

To wave off a small apology as unnecessary, you can say 아니에요 (aniyeyo), literally "no, it's not," in the sense of "no, no, it's nothing," or the casual 아니야 (aniya). You will often hear it doubled and warm, "aniyeyo, aniyeyo," as a friendly way of saying "please don't worry about it at all." In more formal settings someone might use a longer phrase meaning "please don't be concerned about it," but for most situations gwaenchanayo and aniyeyo cover you.

Match your reply to the register of the person apologizing. If a stranger or elder apologizes politely, answer politely with gwaenchanayo or aniyeyo. If a close friend says mianhae, answer casually with gwaenchana. Mirroring their level keeps the exchange smooth. And of course, if you do not actually forgive them, you can withhold the easy "it's okay," but in the flow of daily small mistakes, a warm gwaenchanayo is the normal, gracious response.

Bowing, tone, and apology culture

In Korean, the words are only part of an apology. Body language, tone, and timing carry just as much meaning, and a technically correct apology delivered flatly can still fail. If you learn only the phrases and none of the delivery, your Korean apology will sound like a line read from a script rather than something you feel.

The most visible piece is the bow. A spoken apology in Korean is usually paired with a bow, and the depth of the bow scales with the seriousness. For a light everyday sorry, a small nod of the head is enough, and you barely think about it. For a real apology to an elder, a teacher, or a boss, a fuller bow from the waist shows humility and sincerity. For a grave apology, the bow is deeper and held a moment longer. You do not need to overthink the angles as a beginner, but do build the habit of dipping your head when you apologize; a stiff, upright sorry can read as insincere.

Tone and volume matter too. A sincere apology is spoken softly and a little slowly, with your eyes often lowered rather than staring straight into the other person's, since prolonged eye contact toward an elder can feel confrontational in Korean culture. Rushing the words or saying them brightly, as you might toss off "sorry!" in English, can make the apology feel dismissive. Slow down, soften your voice, and let the pause carry some of the weight.

Hierarchy sits underneath all of it. Korea's social fabric is shaped by relative age and status, so the same mistake calls for a very different apology depending on who you wronged. Bumping a friend and bumping your friend's grandmother are not the same event, and the second asks for more formal words, a deeper bow, and a gentler tone. Being aware of who is older or senior in any interaction is a running background task in Korean life, and apologies are one of the moments it surfaces most clearly. This attentiveness to relationship is a big part of what makes Korean feel hard at first, and our honest look at how long it takes to learn Korean covers why the social layer, not just the alphabet, is where the time really goes.

Worked examples in real situations

Let's put everything together with concrete scenarios, so you can see how the pieces combine in the wild. Each one shows the situation, the natural choice, and why.

• You spill your close friend's coffee. Say 암, 미안해! (a, mianhae!), "oh, sorry!" with a quick apologetic face. Banmal is warm and right; formal speech here would feel oddly cold between friends.
• You bump a stranger on the subway. A quick 죄송합니다 (joesonghamnida) with a small head bow. With a stranger, especially an older one, the formal form plus a nod is the safe, respectful move.
• You're a few minutes late meeting a coworker you're friendly with. Say 미안해요, 닖었주요 in spirit, or simply 미안해요 (mianhaeyo) with a light bow. Polite speech fits an equal you are not super close to.
• You're late to a meeting with your boss. A clear 정말 죄송합니다 (jeongmal joesonghamnida), "I'm truly sorry," with a proper bow. High stakes and a superior call for the strongest formal form plus the intensifier.
• You need to call a server. Raise your hand and say 저기요 (jeogiyo). This is "excuse me" for attention, not an apology, so do not use sorry here.
• You need to squeeze past people to exit a crowded bus. Say 잠깐만요 (jamkkanmanyo) as you move. It politely asks for space without apologizing for a wrong.
• You interrupt a stranger to ask for directions. Open with 실례지만... (sillyejiman...), "excuse me, but...," then ask. The formal opener signals respect before you take their time.
• A friend apologizes to you for being late. Wave it off with 괜찮아 (gwaenchana), "it's fine," or 아니야, 괜찮아 (aniya, gwaenchana), "no, it's okay." Casual reply for a casual apology.
• You genuinely hurt someone close to you. Slow down for 정말 미안해. 내 잘못이야 (jeongmal mianhae. nae jalmosiya), "I'm really sorry. It's my fault," softly and with a bow. Naming the fault and slowing the tone carry the sincerity.

Notice how each choice flows from the same three questions: how close, how senior, how serious. Once those become second nature, picking the right apology stops feeling like a lookup and starts feeling like a reflex. Getting there takes reps out loud, which is exactly what conversation practice provides. If you are still early on the writing system that these phrases are built from, our guide to the Korean alphabet will make the Hangul above far easier to read and sound out.

Quick reference table

Here is everything in one place. Keep this handy until the choices become automatic, and remember that the romanization is only an approximation of the real sounds, which you should train with your ears and mouth, not just your eyes.

Practicing apologies with SPAIKING

You can memorize every word in the table above and still freeze when a real moment arrives, because saying sorry in Korean is not a vocabulary problem, it is a production problem. The right word has to come out, in the right register, with the right tone, at conversational speed, while you are also feeling flustered about whatever you just did wrong. That skill only comes from producing the words out loud, many times, until the choice is automatic.

This is exactly the gap SPAIKING is built to close. Instead of flipping flashcards that test whether you recognize mianhaeyo, you have an actual spoken conversation with an AI partner that plays out the situations where you would apologize. You bump into someone, you are late, you need to call a server, you have to smooth over a mistake with an elder, and you say the phrase out loud in context. Because the AI responds, you also practice the reply half, hearing an apology and answering with gwaenchanayo naturally.

The parts that make it fit learning Korean apologies well:

• It drills register, not just words. The scenarios push you to choose between mianhae, mianhaeyo, and joesonghamnida based on who you are talking to, which is the actual hard part.
• It corrects you in real time. If you use casual speech where you needed formal, SPAIKING flags it, so you fix the register mistake that a textbook would never catch.
• It's judgment-free and always available. You can fumble joesonghamnida ten times at midnight with no embarrassment, which is what finally gets the word to stick in your mouth.
• It builds the reflex. Repeated spoken practice moves these phrases from "I know it" to "I can say it," so the right apology surfaces when you actually need it.

Think of this guide as the map and SPAIKING as the terrain. Reading gave you the system, the three core apologies, the banmal and jondaemal split, the excuse-me phrases, the replies, and the bow that finishes the delivery. Speaking is what turns that knowledge into something your mouth can do under pressure. Pair the two, learn the words here and then say them out loud in real Korean conversation, and the next time you need to apologize, mianhae, mianhaeyo, or joesonghamnida will be right there when you reach for it. You can start on the pricing page and begin practicing your Korean apologies out loud today.